My older pair are at a point where they are baking independently now. It is an excellent state to be in. When they get the idea and inspiration to bake something- whether to satisfy their own sweet tooth, or to produce something gift-worthy- they set to work, recipe in one hand and will in the other.
Today they baked up a superb Irish Soda Bread. It was tasty and perfect. Butter and jam were both coveted options for spreading on this warm slice of golden perfection.
We had baked several loafs a few weeks ago during our celebration of Saint Brigid. We also churned butter, wove crosses made of rushes and read a bit about the life of this saint from Kildaire, Ireland. It was a simple day for our family that spoke both to the oldest and the youngest children, each in their own way.
Our new year started with a burst of good health, peace and a lovely day spent with family. We took New Year's Day as a holiday and started back to school the very next day.
I must admit, it was difficult for me to get into the right frame of mind, difficult to make all of the usual plans and arrangements so as to have a nice, flowing rhythm to our homeschooling. So much to prepare, more mentally and inwardly for me than on paper.
So very much of how our day feels and how it flows depends on my inner life- my thoughts, expectations, emotions and energy level. What a task!
Well, here is a photo I took on New Year's Day of Luca wearing a pair of 'trousers' and trying out his first pair of suspenders. I can't help but smirk when I look at this.
We are blessed to have several 'June birthdays' in our extended family. Today we celebrated three generations worth of birthdays and enjoyed the warmth of the day together.
My sister baked the birthday cake, and when I say 'the' birthday cake, I mean the birthday cake! It was perfectly delicious and was just right for a late-spring-almost-summer celebration.
I am still dreaming about this lemon-raspberry cake!
My sister is such an amazing baker and has earned herself a pretty superb repetoire of baked goods (and non-baked goods like her homemade 'Lara' bars!). It is great to have a partner in life who is as enthusiastic about preparing homemade, nourishing, delicious food to our families as I am!
Thank you for taking time out of your already-full life to make our day so special... and delicious!
So tomorrow I turn 35. I rarely post photos of myself on this blog because typically I am the one behind the lens. This afternoon Nicolas put a red rose that he had just picked from our rose bush behind my ear and I just felt so beautiful and loved.
I am reminded each day of the blessings I have been given in this life not because of any merit or attainment on my part, but simply because they are what makes life beautiful.
Part of keeping this blog is my effort in showing myself what a beautiful life I have indeed. The ability to pick and choose what I share here has a tremendous ability to lend itself to the craft of creating a beautiful life regardless of one's reality.
The truth is that my life actually is perfectly and authentically beautiful. There is order, simplicity, health, joy, love, sorrow, pain, dirty floors, life lessons, good food, good friends and a home-centered life that all makes it perfectly and entirely breathtaking.
Over the years I have learned the art of looking ahead and seeing the big picture. I have trained my mind, my heart and my soul to see beyond the here and now.
Living 'in the moment' seems to be a current cliche that is encouraged in our culture. There is certainly something to be said about cherishing each moment.Paying special attention to the here and now can have a tremendous ability to heal, encourage and cheer. But in the end I believe that it is the ability and capacity to believe in what the future will bring that keeps one 'going' in this life. We all need to know why we are 'doing what we're doing' and be able to draw upon that knowledge to build a vision and a goal for ourselves, our families and our homes. Again, it is in the striving.
It is no easy task.
So tonight, on the eve of my 35th birthday, I celebrate all that I have been given in the life and all that this little, beautiful garden of mine is perpetually blooming into each and every day.
Our baby turned one today. It literally seems like we are still reeling in that new baby-overjoyed-swooning stage one year later!
I think it has everything to do with three older siblings who haven't stopped doting on him since last May when he became 'one of them'. They adore him, protect him, feed him, carry him, wrestle with him, tickle him and scold him when he interferes with their play! True love indeed.
I have no original words to share tonight. No life lessons on infancy. Nor will I share Luca's birth story like I had thought about. Instead I will simply sit here tonight humbled and revel in the miracle of human life, growth, change, love.
We love you Luca. You are a constant 'light' in our home each and every day!
We are taking the week off from schooling this week toprepare for Easter. This is a tradition of ours and it just seems fitting to work towards slowing things down a bit as we lead up to this sacred day.
Sophia made a book with each day of the week and Scripture to read leading up to Easter. Yesterday we read about Jesus cleansing the temple and it made quite a big impression as we talked about keeping the church holy and sacred as a house of prayer as Christ called it.
We always make Resurrection Cookies each year on the night before Easter and each year my children boast how they are going to taste the vinegar... but never get up the nerve to do so!
It seems that the majority of our week has been spent socializing as we have and will continue to visit with friends and family all this week.
Yesterday my children ended up drenched up to their waists from playing in the woods surrounding our friends' home. They just couldn't help themselves despite the stern (ah, unrealistic?) warning to stay dry during our visit. I think this could be the first of many moments being tempted by spring's thaw!
Elias turned five last week! It was a week-long celebration that ended with his first ever 'friend party' which consisted of two sibling groups. I offered to host more of his friends but he was very set on wanting a quiet party!
Here are some photos from the week of celebrating that consisted of family, friends, almond cake, lemon cake, berries and whipped cream, a book basket and felt-wrapped sweets for party favors and a Children of the Forest-inspired bulletin board for his bedroom!
Our firstborn turned nine today. Happy Birthday to my darling Sophia. Nine years ago you entered my life and started me on the most challenging and joyful role of my lifetime. You made me a mother.
What a day we had celebrating Elias' fourth birthday. It was a simple yet splendid day in which I tried to savor the special moments amidst the mundane, normal Monday that we spent today.
It often seems that a child's birthday can pass without so much as a moment to reflect and pause on the very life that is being celebrated. Amidst the birthday preparations- the baking, the gift giving, the making sure that everything is just right- that little child is often lost in the shuffle and one never truly gets a chance to simply just be with him or her.
I made sure that today did not past without being truly thankful Elias and all that he has brought to our family. I took time to look him in the eyes, listen intently, help him with even the simple tasks that I know he could do on his own but just wanted a bit of assistance with, bounce him on my knee, sing to him, bathe him lovingly and just savor this little boy as much as I could.
One of the tenderest parts of the day was watching his sister and brother carry his presents to him with pride, help him adorn his new sword and scabbard with care and gentleness, show him how to properly draw his sword like a real knight and excitingly share in a morning art session with him coloring and sharing his new art supplies and modeling beeswax.
These photos just capture the joy that was felt by all today- bedhead and all. And although watching your baby turn four can be awfully bittersweet, soaking in the sweetness of the sibling bonds that have been formed and the love that is shown to one another even in the simplest acts makes each passing year worth all of it.
It was ten years ago today that I married the man I love most in life, the father of my children, my college boyfriend, my ever-so gentle and loving husband.
It is difficult to feel the significance of these milestone moments when everything in life around you is pulling your attention and time away from reflection. A full life- three energetic and creative children with wants, needs and dreams of their own, a responsibility to educate and nurture these children, a home that needs caring for, relationships to maintain, a social life to manage and plan with discernment, a new life growing inside, work outside of the home, a partner to support, love and carve out time for as well.
But today I will make every effort to let my mind wander back to a decade ago and let the vivid memories wash over me like an ocean wave- the broken night's sleep that I had before our wedding day, the rush to the hair salon with three friends and a sister who were just as excited to have their hair swept up as I was, the bagel with cream cheese that was lovingly brought my way for breakfast that morning, the calm I felt from putting on my own makeup before the wedding ceremony, the gentle snowfall that came right before our trip over to the reception, the delicious cake that was dropped behind the scenes after we had our first taste, the friends and family who honored us with their presence, the basket of cards and well-wishes that I held in my hands on our way up to the honeymoon suite. The night I joined my life with another.
Wishing my love a happy ten years and looking forward to our quiet weekend together.
A new year begins. And although I am not one to make formal new year's resolutions I am always drawn into a time of introspection as I reflect on the year past and the new one unfolding in front of me.
It is always with wonder and gratitude that I review the year gone by. I am so thankful that there is rarely a single regret or disappointment ever felt as I think back on what I as an individual and we collectively as a family experienced, learned and created over the year.
Today I sit in a quiet house, waking much later than usual, and think about what I will strive for this year.
I think long and hard about it. This is easy to do when one is surrounded by complete silence and no ambition other than to be still and reflect.
And the word purpose comes to mind. It trails in and out of my sleepy, yet focused brain and just won't leave me alone. I have no choice but to think long and hard about the reality of having purpose in one's life.
I think about my purpose and am filled with confidence and contentment as I am assured that this is not a mystery to me. I feel blessed because I believe that I have found my earthly purpose and have had the opportunity to fulfill it and live it out to the fullest degree.
Being called to be a wife and mother, in my opinion, is the highest calling on this earth and one that comes directly from our Heavenly Father. It is one which demands humility, quiet strength and a strong vision, because it is the least applaudable of all occupations and rarely ever recognized as a worthwhile calling or as true work.
One can spend a lifetime caring for and nurturing the people in their own home and receive little more than a pat on the back. It is easy to lose heart and to compromise along this journey. But cutting corners comes as a high cost. One that I am not willing to pay.
So it has become a discipline for me over the last decade to find wells of encouragement and springs of inspiration to nourish and refresh me on this journey in the form of books, friendships, enrichment activities and God's word itself.
I am blessed to be surrounded by many family and friends who also value the high calling of motherhood and feeling encouraged daily on this journey on which I have been fortunate enough to begin on. And although there are so many different types of mothers, families and parenting styles in this world I believe that the majority of us have the same vision. And it is this vision that creates bonds and strengthens communities- cornerstones of support and encouragement for this higher purpose.
So as I look to the year ahead, I vow to take each day for what it is worth- a chance to live out this purpose and to continue striving for what is good, worthwhile and valuable. I plan to not take lightly the needs of these little souls around me and to meet them daily with as much simplicity and love as I can find. To be sure that every choice made comes from a place of love and not of spite or a desire to be noticed or commended. To keep my motives in check and to pray for the strength and patience that is needed to continually place other's needs above my own.
Presents were wrapped carefully and then torn open within seconds Hair was curled and proudly shown Bows on dresses were tied Feasts were had Stockings were dug through with excitement Cars were packed Candy canes were used as straws in mugs of hot chocolate Bedtimes were ignored Family time abounded Chocolate and peppermint become a daily staple Simplicity of the season was savored
And here we are home now settling back in. It was truly a Christmas to remember. The children were thankful for every gift they opened even if it wasn't something they wished for. Schedules were halted and time was afforded for time spent doing nothing except enjoy one another's company.
Week 20 of my pregnancy brought with it many changes. An expanding waistline and enormous amount of movement from our growing baby. For those of my friends who have chuckled each week as they commented on how non-pregnant I have looked a big surprise is in store the next time they see me.
My husband surprised me with a gift that I had dropped a gentle hint about weeks ago but didn't really believe would be taken quiet so seriously. Minutes before five o'clock on Christmas Eve our mail carrier delivered a small package from Australia withthis gorgeous felted wool necklace wrapped inside. It's even more beautiful in person.
We have a tradition to exchange gifts with one another on Christmas Eve after the children are tucked snugly into bed and after the last gift is placed under the Christmas tree. Just him and I. Needless to say it's very quiet and the peace and stillness is encouraged all the more by the dim lights surrounding us in nearly every corner of our living room.
Sadly I came home with a bad bout of sinusitis that I thought I had gotten rid of. The holidays have a way of allowing me to let down my defenses enough just enough to stop fighting off the viruses I've been exposed to all year long.
And although last few days have been unpleasant, it has given my children a chance to nurture and care for me. I boldly proclaimed a seven o'clock bedtime for myself last night even though Mike would be at work until after eight. The children picked up their toys, brushed their teeth, donned their warmest winter pajamas and tucked me into bed with every ounce of care and concern that a good nurse would.
They made sure that all my needs were met- neti pot used, humidifier turned on, tissues by the bedside, waste basket next to bed, eucalyptus rub generously applied, lip balm readily available and a cool glass of water by my bed. They played nicely in their rooms as instructed and insisted on checking on me every 10 minutes until that Dad arrived home.
Sophia even gave me a gentle head massage and rubbed my tired feet down with our favorite treat for our skin this winter. What a nurturing little soul!
So as I try my best to heal, I am warmed and soothed by the memories that were made during our Christmas celebration this year.
We had a chance on Monday to participate in our third and final Winter Craft Days with our homeschool co-op. This week we dipped candles. We took turns walking in a line and rotated dipping our candles. Some of the younger dippers tuckered out before their candles were finished so I ended up dipping two sets while my kids played with their co-op friends for one of the last times this year.
Some of the other handicrafts that we've had a chance to experience were making felted wool soap and braiding rag rugs.I have so enjoyed these crafts and can't wait to try them on my own at home.
After the candles were dipped and we hung them to set, we all gathered around and sang Christmas songs. It was a spectacular and precious hour where the children were given the opportunity to choose their own carols and lead the rest of the group in chorus.
The children felt so proud to be able to stand on stage and sing their songs. There were some sweet moments, like when Sophia and her friends sang Silent Night. There were also several comedic moments such as when Nicolas, Elias and their good friend Michael and his little brother Mark volunteered to lead the group in singing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. There was not a dry eye in the room after laughing so hard that we cried . These boys need to take their show on the road. Seriously.
It was a wonderful time spent using our hearts and hands to prepare for the Christmas season.
One of the best things about starting your own family are the old traditions that get the chance to be carried on and the new traditions that get to be started for the first time.
For our family, one of those new traditions is cutting down our own Christmas tree.
This splendid day just happen to coincide with our first snowfall of the season. And although it was just a dusting of snow, the ground was white and the world looked a bit softer and quieter when we woke up that morning.
I have to admit that one of my favorite parts of the entire experience is the part where we walk and walk in search of that perfect tree. At times it feels like aimless wandering, but in the end all five of us end up agreeing on the same tree.
This year we decided to make our own eggnog. It was a simple recipe that required nothing but patience on the part of both the children and Mike. After four hours of cooking and cooling we were able to sip on some of the tastiest and spiciest eggnog that I have ever tasted. Somehow, nutmeg just makes everything taste better.
Somehow I think that the eggnog tradition will continue to be carried on for years to come also.
We had our ultrasound yesterday and are so thrilled to announce that our baby is healthy and forming perfectly. I nearly forgot how lengthy these visits are- a darkened room filled with anticipation, silence and lots of warm gel on your abdomen as a stranger pokes and prods your stomach measuring and scanning your tiny baby's entire being.
In the end, a sigh of relief is had as you learn that every organ, bone and part of this baby has miraculously formed as it should have. It is astonishing to me to see how this little human life has formed so perfectly and fully inside of me- an imperfect person. A truly humbling experience.
We also decided to take a little peek and learned that this new baby is a BOY!
There is so much excitement in our house as the vision of this new little baby is becoming more of a reality. I can hardy believe that I am nearly half way through my pregnancy. And has experience has taught me, I know that the weeks will continue to pass as quickly as they have thus far. Before we know it May will be here and our baby's birth will be imminent.
My thoughts turn towards all of the preparations that must be had before we are ready to welcome this new life- both in the physical and mental and emotional realm. Do we have a place for our baby to sleep? What about diapers... will we finally make that decision to try cloth? Do I have clothing ready to dress him in? Am I ready to experience the birth process again? What will my labor be like? How will our other children respond to this new life in our home?
I have had the courage to attempt to ask and answer only a few of these questions up until now. Others I am simply not prepared to begin facing yet.
Pregnancy is truly such a time of varying emotions. It seems that one moment I am loving life and relishing the beautiful life I have been blessed with. While the next moment is spent fretting and tearing up over a remembered encounter with a child during that day that did not go as gently and lovingly as planned.
It seems that there is a corresponding emotional state to nearly each color of the rainbow- the joyful and carefree yellows, the sad and regretful blues, the passionate and angry reds. And often, this full spectrum of feelings can be experienced in a single day or even afternoon.
It seems that it is simply the story of motherhood enhanced and being told in a deeper way than usual.
I've always lamented the disappearance of normal every time a new baby has joined our family. It always pained me to face the reality that things would never again be the same before each child was born. But it always brought me comfort to know that sooner or later we would find our new normal and that once again, family life would resume, albeit in a very different way.
I look forward to the new way of life that awaits us next Spring and patiently wait- threechildren snuggled in one arm, pregnant belly being gently patted by the other- for our new normal to begin.
So as the poem mentioned- six little feet entered the street... what a Halloween night that was.
This year we had a doctor, a Jedi and a knight. Only one costume was handmade, one bought and the other pieced together an hour beforehand.
When you're three, you tend to change your mind in the weeks, days and hours leading up to trick-or-treat and the costume is typically decided by which one you mentioned last right before heading out the door. After a little toy armor, a hoodie and some duct tape, Elias was good to go and was quite proud to be a knight in shining armor.
Nicolas had been asking me all summer to make him a Jedi cloak just like Anakin Skywalker. This is a child who rarely makes any requests let alone mentions them repeatedly. I had ignored the project all summer and I think it was nearly the end of August before I finally started sewing the cloak. It wasn't until mid-September before I actually found another sewing session to sit and finish it.
He was thouroughly pleased by the authenticity of the cloak and really loves how the hood and sleeves hang in just the right way. The authenticity was perfected by the poses and glowing lightsaber.
I will sat the the process itself was more than a challenge. But it was sewn with love and the image of that little dimpled face gently reminding me that he was pretty sure that we forgot about the Jedi cape- a super sweet way of saying Mom, why are you neglecting my request-was enough to get me off the sofa during my first few weeks of pregnancy and to the sewing machine for some stitching.
The doctor costume was purchased with a special payment plan- if you save half, we'll pay the other half. Sophia was pretty set on wearing scrubs and since they are no real-life child-sized scrubs, we had to purchase this costume.
A little Halloween art from my pair of author/illustrator children. They sat down a couple of weeks ago to compose a poem about trick-or-treat and took their task quite seriously. Sophia wrote the majority of the poem and she asked Nicolas to draw a picture to show what an autumn night might look like.
On Halloween night, the kids are in sight And everyone will not be sleeping. The kids run around the entire town And the grown-ups just sit around waiting. Six little feet enter the street, The leaves blow around And the children no frown. What a Halloween night that was!
I am one of those rare adults who actually adores celebrating and being remembered on my birthday. And no matter what decade I am working my way through, this desire to accept, relish and remember the day I was born simply grows stronger.
Today I turned thirty-two. I think that I am just about the luckiest person on earth and believe that I am truly living the life that I envisioned for myself. This reality just about takes my breath away every day and I am humbled and grateful for all that I have been given.
I am truly content.
It seems that with each passing year I grow more comfortable in my own skin, feel more able to accept just who it was that I was created to be and feel the increased freedom and courage needed to let go of those ideals in life which hold no eternal significance or true purpose for me and instead aim to live out each day with deliberation and truth.
Today was an ideal day- an impromptu trip to the ocean for a day spent in warm sand, salty water and revitalizing ocean air with my favorite four people. We literally brought a ball to play with and the rest of the day was spent enjoying the elements and all of the gorgeous natural surroundings that the beach has to offer.
Could life get any better than this?
Needless to say, it was just about the most perfect way to spend celebrating the beginning of my thirty-second year on this earth.
It is difficult to feel the significance of these milestone moments when everything in life around you is pulling your attention and time away from reflection. A full life- three energetic and creative children with wants, needs and dreams of their own, a responsibility to educate and nurture these children, a home that needs caring for, relationships to maintain, a social life to manage and plan with discernment, a new life growing inside, work outside of the home, a partner to support, love and carve out time for as well.
After the candles were dipped and we hung them to set, we all gathered around and sang Christmas songs. It was a spectacular and precious hour where the children were given the opportunity to choose their own carols and lead the rest of the group in chorus.
